FRIENDSHIPS: Connecting with Aspects of Self

What does friendship mean to you? How many friends would you say that you truly have? Think about your closest friends, would you say they are forever friends or is it possible that they are there temporarily for a reason such as to teach you a valuable lesson? What about you? What type of friend are you? What are you teaching your friends? How are you improving their experience?

I’ve been one that when I connect with someone I tend to go all in because I’ve always been fascinated by the human psyche and connection. What does connection mean to you? To me, connection means belonging, understanding and expansion. When I think back to my many strong connective bonds, I see that they were valuable teachers for me in my journey. In fact, they ARE priceless.

These relationships and connections have helped me become the person that I am today. These key players have helped to shape and mold myself into the unique expression that I am, although I will keep reinventing myself as time goes on. At the same time, I have found myself being lost within these key relationships. Do you lose yourself in your relationships? I’ve lost focus on meeting my own needs because I have become so enmeshed with them. I have managed to use this seeming problem of self-loss in order to understand myself better and expand into a higher version of myself.

Many times, more than I can count, I have completely lost myself within my cherished friendships. This pattern that I noticed within myself started way back in my early childhood. I remember the song Karma Chameleon back in the 80’s and that seemed to be the theme song for what I was experiencing. Do you know that song? Am I dating myself here?

One afternoon, that song played in my head as I was contemplating my strong drive to connect so deeply with my friends that I melded and molded into an extension of them.  Many times I would imagine what life would be like through their filters. Even though I am usually one with quite strong convictions and opinions in regards to things that I’ve thought about deeply, I would want to see situations through the eyes of my very close friends. Why? Because my desire has always been to understand in order to expand in awareness.

Have you heard of the saying people arrive in our life for a season, reason or a lifetime?

Regardless of whether you believe someone to have entered your life for a reason, season or a lifetime, we were meant to meet whomever we meet. It was already written in the stars because that person is an energetic match to us in that moment. Based on what vibration is most predominant within us, we are calling in that karmic contract that we arranged prior to incarnating in this world. It is a beautiful dance; it is a wonderful orchestra. The most wonderful thing is that we are doing the same for them in return. We are always exchanging information and energy. Not only do they help us grow, we also do the same for them. Service is our dance with our friends. Although we are always in service to each other (or so we could strive to be), we must not lose ourselves in the process.

Our individual expression is unique and perfectly wonderful in every sense of the word. We can strive to understand, grow, belong and expand, and still manage to keep our individuality in tact. Balance is key here as we take in what we choose to take in as a way to increase our potential. Balance is not always easily achieved especially if you have that Chameleon pattern as I do; yet it can be achieved with higher awareness. The way to achieve higher awareness is through Self-Inquiry and listening to the guidance that arises from within.

I’ve had to say farewell to many of my close friends when our job together came to a close. Although it has been quite painful for me to let go of these treasured friendships, I trust in the process that keeps unfolding as we collectively evolve into better versions of ourselves. The best part is that perhaps in the future our paths will converge once again and we can pick up right where we left off; only as healthier and more fulfilled individuals. As we expand, we grow more mature and keep the treasured lessons as we release the suffering that letting go may spark. We joyfully enter the Divine Flow once we focus on the gratitude we feel for experiencing those enlightening connections.

Have a great week!


Suzan Smadi

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